Forgiveness

 

They say holding onto anger is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. Well what can I say, except... there are times I still hope.

 

This repulsive feeling deep within consumes me everytime I look upon your face. I wish we no longer had to cross paths, yet I must tolerate you because the choice is not mine to make.

 

Sometimes I wish I could forgive and let go of the bitterness I feel but I still cannot understand who you've become. A decade I've known you, yet, I don't know you. 

 

Did you ever feel burdened having to wear two faces? I wonder how you stood before us unashamed of your sins.

 

And now I must embrace you as though nothing has happened? As though you never broke my family to pieces by your selfish actions? They expect me to just forget yet everytime I see you my stomach turns and I am repulsed.

 

They say forgive, they say it over and over, but how do I forgive and forget the things I know? How do I ignore that feeling deep inside that you will hurt my family again? How do I forget the images of them falling apart? How do I forget?

 

But more importantly, will YOU forget?

 

Will you forget this road to redemption or will it just be one more thing you take for granted?

 

Haven't we been here before?

 

And yet they still wonder why i can't forgive...